Relationships- Now complex

"Too much of logic and too little of  love has doomed this planet"
Just a while ago I had lived in the world of either black or white specially with ref to relationships but now I discover that there is grey also  ,not just grey, but different shades of it.

Relationship (as in love) was focused on love,it was simple arithmetic, you either love someone or you dont. But now its diversified view has made the relationship between two people so complex that they end up liking someone they love n loving someone they actually like or worst of the case ,lose faith in any relationship altogether. People now want to "SEE" how it goes.. ,they want to calculate where the opposite person stands in their scale of priorities of looks,education, status, money blah blah..for christ sake! wht all this have to do with love anyways? Isnt love suppose to be a feeling and not a scale? After all this analysis is there any room for feelings?I think not,it becomes a corporate deal where you either compromise or you lose,you never win because no one on this planet earth is going to be 100% according to what you want,for hell sake you yourself  change your priorities(n yrself) like zillion times with age,time,social conditions etc etc and thn you end up rejecting everyone or settling for someone whom you can show off to the world and boost your ego.What a waste of life.!!!

Ahhh... DATING.. this word somehow has gone right above my head without even being close for me to understand the hang of it..I mean wht?... is tht crap? After a lot of inquiry and polls I ve concluded that DATING is a word which means - " My heart likes you but my brain must approve of you which will be decided by the way you dress, your manners,n money,how hot ur ,n what my friends think of you, I dont have guts to get into a relationship so let me at least go out with u so that I can sooth my feelings n thus you stand chance of a relationship if all the criteria are met else......out you go... n I dont care how U feel about it...n I dnt have to give you any explanation for my coward behavior" .
    I dont mean that get into a relationship without knowing, you can be friends first..know each other n thn decide, why keep both of yourself hanging on the rope of "DATE"? The reason for this is people are very scared of "going wrong" when it comes to their life with others, they want to be perfect even if it means to neglect your feelings for the opposite person no matter how true they are,you want to do the "RIGHT THING"(whtever that means). The fear of being wrong has seeped in so badly in people's minds that they would rather die or kill someone than be said as WRONG. Yes they do kill, their own feelings, their own heart for the sake of something which itself isnt permanent. The conditions at which people approve one another itself is so fragile that it will fade away within no time--looks,money,status will never last forever.The only thing which you always neglected will be with u till the end- YOUR HEART/your feelings !!! n sadly by the time you realise it,you are either dead or close to it..

  In old times feelings were more important n that was the reason the relationship never broke,they also had their share of fights n misunderstandings still they believed in LOVE for each other... people use to listen to their inner voice not judge( like recent times)  based on fruitless things. For Gods sake look at married couples now, 6 months-1 year n divorce.NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES HAVE THEY DATED. (psst.. coz when you are dating you are wearing a mask  not being yr true self  coz u gotta  please the opp person,ROFL).When the foundation itself is weak of a relationship,the building is going to fall one day,and it does.. rather then trust and love u put conditions,where you should hold hands,you leave it  thats why there is extra marital affairs,u again fall for same qualities that once attracted you in your current partner in someone else n there you go..n you will continue this behavior till you get frustrated when noone matches your list any more.This wont happen if your love is based on complete acceptance of each other,faith in each other,the passion to walk life together but no, Girls think I can earn +got (artificial) great looks I can get anyone. Guys think Im THE MAN earning more thn women I can get anyone , who cares for this one? ..and their life goes in this attitude and THE ONE never comes..Be "the ONE" first to attract "the ONE".. What are you giving it to the opposite person that you are asking for something in return? ask yourself this and thn think about a relationship or even before passing a judgement on anyone.It is indeed very wise to know your feelings before committing, dont get me wrong I do not propagate blind commitment. What I speak of it letting go of the fear to be in one.There is nothing to be afraid of. Hurt? Yes,everyone is going to hurt us. Dont we have our differences with our own parents,siblings,friends? We do not run away or isolate ourselves in a corner.we go ahead and sort it out.The same thing could be applied to this beautiful relationship also. Blocking yourself and making excuses to not commit isnt a way to solve anything.In the end either one will be lonely which they will realise at the age of say 70 or will be forced to get into some form of relationship by the society. Either the case,its Commitment phobic's loss.

Set your heart free, dont cage it with conditions,Be a believer of love,of goodness of BELIEF itself.Everyone had/has gone though bad experiences when it comes to relationship or even life,its a learning experience.One faces challenges even in life,so do we give up on life?no then why on love?just because u can choose to not be in?Its human basic nature to want love and feelings and by blocking the feelings we somewhere block our very own nature which in tern makes us no better to a stone.Dont be control freak and try to control everything and everyone.There is so much of "I" in a relationship where it should be "WE" , put less of  "I" and see things from "US" point of view,trust me you will have the most satisfying relationship ever.  Because this is what love is all about-- WE

Love n Light......n @ last NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON LOVE (no matter wht n how many times u have faced failure... God bless you with UNCONDITIONAL LOVE)

Me v/s World

There comes a time in every one's life where you really have to choose between yourself and someone else, some close to you, someone whom you really love. You are forced to choose between your happiness and that person's. What would you do in such a time? Our society teaches to be "sacrificing" to keep others happy and let go of your happiness.. But truly I believe the exact opposite. I feel how can you make others happy when you yourself are disconsolate ? Even if you can (taken for granted that you can) bring happiness to someone else , are you really being true to yourself? Don't you deserve to be happy? Aren't you as human as the one you love? Than why this discrimination?wouldn't you for a fraction of a second also feel "oh I wish things would have gone in my favour" ? I bet you would. Then isn't it better option to make yourself happy before you make others? Isn't it said by the wise that your outer world is reflection of your inner?So if one makes her/his Inner world ie THE SELF, joyous the same person's surrounding will also show the same. If you are content within, your vibrations will be so high that others also will feel joyous , content when you are around or might also take you as a mentor , as someone who brights up their days.

There are hell of myths created by the society, sacrificing, being selfless etc are to name a few. just to distinguish between desreving and non deserving. Enlightened are the people who knows no discrimination. Here mind you , I'm not saying that you should be negatively selfish. There is fine , very fine line between loving yourself and being cruel to others to suit yourself. The CREATOR has made us that way that we are always helpful to others around us. Try imagine life where no one has to help anyone else, would there be love? would there be life? it would be like a dead men walking, zombies. No, we are not created to be this, we are created to help each other, sometimes emotionally, physically , mentally or by just being there (just the presence). So coming back, being negatively selfish is taking away someone Else's rights (could be any rights,not just judicial) to make yourself happy for eg. plotting against an employee so that you may get next promotion.It is possible that the candidate would be more deserving than you. Having healthy self respect , loving yourself first and thus loving others is what Im talking about here.It is wonderous if you can give other people the smile they lost in the battle of life.BUT NOT at the cost of your own. ( I may sound someone promoting selfish word here, it isnt so.Its an observation coming from experience.)There isnt any need to boost someone elses ego at the cost of your self respect. By all means BE THERE FOR YOURSELF.Make yourself chipper and see the whole world chirping with you ;).

"NEVER COMPROMISE ON YOURSELF, YOU ARE ALL YOU HAVE GOT".Yes, it hurts, yes it feels "oh I'm being so nasty with someone I love"(you are not, you are saving someone from the trouble she/he would go through by seeing you in sadness).Things will be ugly in the beginning but time is the key word here.. It heals the deepest wounds, only if you allow it to.
"Pick yourself before you pick someone else" is the ingredient for happy life. But remember THE FINE LINE ;)

Love n Light..

still loving you

It was then tht i thought i knew u
led me to the disappointment today i feel.
it hurts to let you go,
it kills to be with you.
leaving you was never an option,
loving you is still a chance;
a way tht i wont take any more though i always did.
still long to b with you..
Im loving you still........................

Acceptance-harder implemented thn said.

From past few days something I ve been noticing the non-accepting aspect of people. If it is personal life, relationship or even if it is accepting ownself.

We are trying to be "perfect", but for what? for whom?why?what is the definition of PERFECT? It means one thing to 1 person other thing to other? Why do we have to struggle so that someone will accept us?sp the SOCIETY?Simple answer-EGO- .We want everyone to boost our ego.. we all want to feel SUPERIOR to the other..(such a silly thought it is)and to feed itself,ego makes us stoop to lowest level.we are always taught,we are always compared right from the childhood till we die. Has anyone ever noticed that in the process of "fitting into the society", one becomes so non accepting to his own self?Criticizing your self, disrespecting..gosh! so many words.. Its pity to see people not accepting the way they are..Most of the times we are forced to do things which we dont like?coz we want everyone to accept us,Whts d need for you to be accepted by others?They are never going to be satisfied with the change you make for them,you bet they will hardly even notice it .. Live with the belief that all are equal and you will never have any need to please anyone. Just a question-HAVE WE EVER ACCEPTED OURSELF? Have we ever loved our ownself tht we want others to love us? NO.. thts d answer I swear you will get. . Accept yourself the way you are.. Love yourself as you would love anyone else.

Everyone wants everyone to change,their partners, parents, friends..everyone, why cant people just accpet each other the way they are, most of the disappointments/relationship break ups that happens is due to neglecting the others freedom and imposing your own ideologies on them. Just imagine when you love someone for who they are and you love yourself the way you are,how much less pain you will cause yrself and the other person//Just love them for who they are even if you have thousands of differences,doesnt matter.Acceptance is very strong emotion.like love,it can over come anything.

Start with yourself:Get up every morning look into the mirror and say " no matter who says what to me/about me , I accept myself , I love myself" and thn see d difference..Once you start accepting yourself others will also act in different manner wid you.. As all is linked..